The Teleportation Tweak. Just make certain you have turned on your audio equipment and it's warm when you place the call!
For USD 60 you get an instant upgrade that affects all elements of sonic performance. Riiiiiight ...

http://www.machinadynamica.com/machina60.htm 

The Teleportation Tweak is the extraordinary new product from Machina Dynamica. The Teleportation Tweak is an advanced communications technique discovered and developed by Machina Dynamica for upgrading audio systems remotely, even over very long distances. The Teleportation Tweak is performed during a phone call to Machina Dynamica; the tweak itself takes about 30 seconds. The call can be made via landline phone or cell phone.

Remarkably, the Teleportation Tweak is independent of distance and signal transmission medium, thus will work anywhere in the world. The "tapping signals" transmitted over the phone will not attenuate even over great distances. So far, the Teleportation Tweak has been successfully demonstrated for distances up to 4000 miles (6500 km). While not absolutely necessary, the customer's audio system can be warmed up prior to the phone call if A/B testing the Teleportation Tweak is desired.

The effects of the Teleportation Tweak are instantaneous and the improvement to the sound will be audible immediately. The Teleportation Tweak excels in layering, texture, inner detail, air and that you-are-there presence of real music. Bonus: The picture quality of any video system will also be improved! The Teleportation Tweak works over landline phone or cell phone. Customer should pay via Paypal or check/MO prior to calling Machina Dynamica. Machina Dynamica's Teleportation Tweak $60.

Wow! And I bet some people call! It reminds me of that "Broadband through your sewage system" scam.

Andy T.

All the right words -  all the same old ***!!

 . . . . . but different day.

One this reminded me of was the 'audiophile lightbulbs', which supposedly created less electromagnetic interference and smoothened out the mains supply.

A reference to, I suppose, optical compressors in the recording chain - similar to valve characteristics i.e. gentle, warm distortion. However lightbulbs??? - Bo**ocks!

I have this "vision" of a bloke who has spent $14.500 on two one meter lengths of interconnects placing a call to have his audio system voodoo'd from afar.

"I'll be damned if it doesn't sound better now!" 

Compact fluorescent lightbulbs are not audiophile items then...

Seems this company has nothing else than tweak things, checkout these pebbles :

http://www.machinadynamica.com/machina31.htm

or this:

http://www.machinadynamica.com/machina34.htm

 The most frightful thing, I suppose, is that they earn money...

Martin

And this one beats the lot ...

http://www.machinadynamica.com/machina44.htm

 

Oh my, oh my ...

Martin

Is this legal?

Looks like money well spent!!!

 

kind regards

 

Dave 

I think they must be laughing until they cry whenever they get an order.

I guess they're the kind that don't need to sleep at night, how they can sell such utter junk is beyond me...

Another one I remember was a guy selling (very expensive) crystals which when arranged around a power amplifier in the correct pattern, would increase the amp's dynamics and detail dramatically...

Yeh right! What's the point on improving something if you're already very happy with it?